Happy Freaking Labor Day

The official release wasn't quite like this, but let me give you the basics:

Happy freaking Labor Day, everyone.

But before you gear up for a big fun weekend celebrating the end of the summer, we suits wanted to let you little people employees know that we've made a recent decision to no longer contribute anything to your retirement.

Remember how last year we sold y'all on this new retirement plan that was going to be better for you AND more cost effective for the company? Well, we realized that we could save the company EVEN MORE money by not giving you anything at all! You're on your own now. Good luck.

And keep in mind, the annual merit raises are still in effect. We've gotta keep something to keep y'all from jumping ship. We'll probably institute a pay freeze and a furlough program soon enough, but if we announce that right now everyone will panic even more than they already are.

Remember, as always, the officers of the company are the only people who have a pay freeze right now. We know it's hard for you, considering the current economic situation, but just imagine how hard it is for us! We're only making 6-figures, and we're never gonna make it to 7-figures with this pay freeze. Consider yourselves fortunate.

Have a happy holiday! See your pathetic butts on Tuesday!

-Mgmt

Ridiculous. I'm a stupid sheep for buying into any of it. Anybody got any new career ideas for me? So, maybe it isn't really that bad, but that's how it felt. Good morning, here's a nice kick in the balls.

I like my job. Or at least, I don't strongly dislike my job. It pays the bills. And I really like my boss and his boss. They've been very good to me. And I really don't want to go job hunting, so I guess I'll stick it out. I knew the company was in trouble 5+ years ago when I took this gig, so it's not like I should be surprised. I'll be patient.