My Run-in With the Crappy Umpire

This one ump and I have some history together. I told him how terrible he was last year when he screwed us out of a game. A few weeks ago, we had him for the first time this year. He called our speediest guy out at first when he was clearly safe. In the same inning, he called me (not our speediest guy) out at first on a play in which I was clearly safe.

The next inning, he called their guy safe at first on a play in which he was clearly out.
I gave him a small piece of my mind, encouraging him to at least be consistent if he's going to be making the wrong calls. He didn't respond.

Next inning, same situation, I beat out a grounder, he calls me out. My composure was pretty much gone at this point. I let a few fly. He didn't respond. And when he didn't respond, I let a few more fly.

Finally, he responded, which was apparently what I was looking for. I wanted his attention. He told me my next words would be from the parking lot. I gave him a few more, but he didn't follow through on throwing me out because he's a vulgar euphemism for a feline. (No, really, I don't think I have anger issues. I'm fine. Cool as a cat. And what poor timing to compare myself to a cat, dontcha think?)

Last week, we had him again. I playfully went up for the coin toss and told him I was planning on being on my best behavior tonight. He wasn't amused. Oh well, I guess I have an enemy. And he &$#%ed up a few more calls against us on a game that we lost in the bottom of the 7th.

Sheesh.