My Talk Radio Invention

Have I mentioned that I struggle to maintain control of myself? Yes, yes, recently, I wrote about being an addict of many things. Well one of these things is AM talk radio. I’ve had times when I felt addicted to Jim Rome, Gary Burbank, Willie Cunningham, and don’t even get me started about 55KRC dropping Glenn Beck. Oh, how I miss thee Glenn, let me count the ways. My work mornings will never be the same without you, my Mormon friend, from 9 to noon.

Callahan commented recently that I need to share with everyone the wonders of… an invention that shall remain nameless until later in the post. And I always do whatever he tells me to do, because we share a mutual love for Youppi. So, without further ado, here’s a story I first shared with Callahan and company on I-71 on the way to Jacobs Field a few summers ago…

My Jim Rome addiction is ancient history, as he mostly just gets on my nerves these days. He’s just a little too L.A. for me. I still tune in every once in a while, but certainly not daily. Right after I started my first job as a college graduate, I used my lunch hour to listen to Rome’s takes. June 2003, I believe. Jay Williams was a guard for the NBA Chicago Bulls, and he had just been in a devastating motorcycle accident in which his pelvis shattered, amongst other injuries. Needless to say, Williams hasn’t had much basketball success since the injury.

Rome was talking about the injury, specifically how various news agencies were reporting that Williams was in fact wearing a helmet. Rome’s main point was that the helmet obviously didn’t do his pelvis much good. He proceeded to rant and rave in his typical fashion about how much of a genius he would be if he marketed a helmet for the pelvis. Brilliant me, I emailed rome@haveatake.com: “Dear Rome, you should name your invention The Pelmet. Regards, Scott in the ‘Nati.”

3 minutes later, he read my email on his show heard on hundreds of stations throughout this great land. His response was, “that’s a great idea, Scott, I like that.” And if you’ve ever listened to him, you know that he holds on to any idea he thinks is decent for long period of time. For the next 3 weeks, he mentioned The Pelmet by name at least once every show.

I am not a clone, nor was I ever a clone. I was just the brilliant man with the brilliant name to a brilliant product that doesn’t exist. I am a loser.