Tear My Stillhouse Down

I want to have it all together. I want to be the man that I want to be. I don't want the same struggles to pester me for the rest of my life. I don't want any skeletons in my closet leftover as my legacy.

Basically, I don't want to leave a note to my loved ones like this on my deathbed:

No stone on my head, no flowers on my tomb
No gold-plated sign in a marble-pillared room
The one thing I want when they lay me in the ground
When I die, tear my stillhouse down

Tear my stillhouse down, let it go to rust
Don't leave no trace of the hiding place where I made that evil stuff
For all my time and money, no profit did I see
That old copper kettle was the death of me

- Gillian Welch, "Tear My Stillhouse Down" from Revival

I don't want anyone to have to hold their breath while cleaning out my closet when it's my time to be put in the ground.

The beautiful thing is that we don't have to leave such a trail of crap in our wake. While we'll surely continue to struggle in various ways for the rest of our days, with authentic friends to challenge us in our battles, our stillhouses can be torn down before we go.

It takes humility and risk to open up, though. Are we willing? They are ugly, nasty, evil stillhouses. But they don't have to win. Please, lets tear down the stillhouses together. If you don't have anyone to share the burden with, I'd be honored to help carry the load.