Two Sundays ago at the conclusion of the 9:15 service, our congregation gathered around Sean and his wife and their children at the front of the church. The people closest to the family laid hands on the family. The people behind those laying hands laid their hands on the people in front of them. It was a big web of people, united in prayer for a family about to undergo big changes.
Amen was said, and the congregation returned to their coffee cups and casual conversations, their restaurant lunches and football-watching.
Well, most of the congregation returned to their stereotypical suburban American Christian comforts. Sean and family went straight from the church building to CVG. By around noon, when the 11:00 congregation prayed for Sean and family (sans the physical presence of Sean and family), Sean had already said his goodbyes and was in the air. Destination: Iraq.
Bye, sweetheart. I love you, dear children. Be good. See you all in about a year.
I loathe the days when I leave the house before my wife and kids are awake, only to return home after the kids are asleep. I can't stomach the thought of going on a business trip for multiple days and not seeing my bride or my Toby.
There's no way I can even begin to fathom being away from them, in the eastern hemisphere, for an entire year.
Sean has been gone almost 2 weeks, and I've yet to see an email from the church in regard to ways to support Sean and his family. As the days go by, I find myself getting frustrated, thinking that the church's thoughts must be well, Sean is gone for a year, we've prayed for him, our job is done...
But who is "the church"? Well, I am, I suppose. What can the church do to support Sean and his family right now? Rephrased, what can I do to support Sean and his family right now?
May we never be content simply to have people in our thoughts. Can I support Sean's family by cooking them a big hot dinner once a month? Can I support Sean's family by raking their yard when the leaves fall and shovelling their driveway when the snow falls? How the heck do I love and serve someone who is half a world away?
Who are you loving? Not just who are you thinking about, or who do you occasionally pray for. Who are you getting off your ass and doing something for?
May we ask the questions we don't know the answers to. May we fight for the answers to those questions. May we love. Or are we too comfortable?
2 comments:
I don’t think this is as black and white as you think – that the church, and specifically our church is guilty of sitting on their asses and not loving people.
1. Maybe some of our pastors did offer further help to Sean’s family, and they declined saying they have enough help for now.
2. We receive many prayer requests and hear many stories of families going through devastatingly hard times. It would be impossible for each church member who hears these stories to cook each of these families meals, rake their leaves, shovel their driveways etc. I think if a story touches you personally, and you feel personally called to take action, do it, but I don’t think it’s fair to be critical of the entire church for not singling this situation out more than some of the others in need. Maybe our church needs someone to organize a more formal system.
3. I think more people do take action than you realize, but they may do these deeds in secret, or at least not make a public announcement about it. There are many ministries and individuals in our church loving people by meeting their physical, spiritual and emotional needs.
4. I understand your point about how easy it is to just say a prayer and then move on, but you still can’t underestimate the power of prayer, and it may be the best thing you can do, and it may be all some people can offer.
5. Why do you assume everyone went back to their coffee and lunch without giving Sean a second thought - you did?
6. I’m not convinced that the “suburban” folks lives are so comfortable and carefree. They have their own heartaches and hurts. They may be struggling to feed their own family and take care of their own households’ needs.
7. I’m sure there are some people that need a call to action and could stand to sacrifice a little bit more, but it doesn’t apply to our entire church.
On the whole I think I get what you're saying, but it just comes off so harsh, and like you think you're the only one who cares. I know you probably do not mean that, but just think about it.
I think about Sean. Although I don't know him or his family. There are many military wives on my mommy forum and they act as daily reminders to the sacrifices made for this war.
So he is certainly not forgotten. I cannot imagine being a mom with no dad for backup. I definitely cannot imagine being a dad thousands of miles away from people who really love me either.
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